So after six hours of install time, I am now the proud new owner of AT&T’s U-verse deal. I signed up for this package since it was going to be on a fiber-optic network and improve my speeds. Well, now that all is said and done, I find out that my download speed is definitely not better….it might of actually slowed down a tiny bit.  My upload is faster, but not anywhere near the 1.5Mbps that they sold me on. Try 1Mbps.  So I guess I doubled my upload speed, which is at least an improvement. Other than that, I found out that this new U-verse deal doesn’t have anything to do with wiring fiber-optic cable into customers’ houses. They sell it as if that were the case, when in reality, “the box down the street, that you connect to, is fiber-optic”. So….it’s the same dsl wiring that I was using in the first place.
If you’re a total TV nerd, the package seems pretty neato. Massive DVR, a billion channels, programable recording of up to four shows at once, etc….all great for TV junkies. Me, I get to ‘try it out’ for 30 days, then cancel the TV, and keep the new upload speed for free.  Oh, plus a fifty dollar check for doing a weekday instal. Not bad, but I’m still bummed that I didn’t get the 4Mbps they sold me on…and I really wanted to know that fiber-optic cable ran straight to my house. Becuase that would only mean faster speeds, sooner than later.

Word,
 -zOnk

So….last night Zire and I (zonk) were out in the cold up on shakey-ass ladders painting this sign. We were told there was going to be scafolding, which would have made things a lot easier, but we managed. Obviously this is extremely tame compared to the amount of detail and color we’re used to using, but this is what the project called for.
If you haven’t heard of the Light Gallery, it’s a new art gallery on 17th St. in Costa Mesa (click this for their myspace). Lot’s of good stuff is going on there, so be sure to check it out.

*I thought I’d be out there at the perfect time this morning to get sunlit pictures…unfortunately for me, it was the perfect time to have a major reflection problem.

Word. Send an email to have us paint your place!…heheheh.

Peace,
-zOnk.oNe

*close-ups:

*click to enlarge

For a couple years I’ve been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job, earwax buildup, poor blood pressure or anything else I could think of. But now I found out the real reason. I’m tired because I’m overworked.

Here’s why:
The population of this country is 273 million.
140 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do the work.

Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government, leaving 19 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing “insurgents” and “extremists”. Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.
Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for state and city governments. That leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals, leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons. That leaves just two people to do the work.

You and me.

And there you are sitting on your ass, at your computer, reading jokes.
Nice. Real nice!!

*an oldie but goodie

BERLIN – A man nearly died from alcohol poisoning after quaffing a liter (two pints) of vodka at an airport security check instead of handing it over to comply with new carry-on rules, police said Wednesday.

The incident occurred at the Nuremberg airport on Tuesday, where the 64-year-old man was switching planes on his way home to Dresden from a holiday in Egypt.

New airport rules prohibit passengers from carrying larger quantities of liquid onto planes, and he was told at a security check he would have to either throw out the bottle of vodka or pay a fee to have his carry-on bag checked as cargo.

Instead, he chugged the bottle down — and was quickly unable to stand or otherwise function, police said.

A doctor called to the scene determined he had possibly life-threatening alcohol poisoning, and he was sent to a Nuremberg clinic for treatment.

The man, whose name was not released, is expected to be able to complete his journey home in a few days. (source: msnbc)

I know how this dude feels…hehehe…last year I got a Jagermeister gift package with a 1.75 liter bottle and two shot glasses. I forgot that I had it in my backpack, since I had so much stuff to pack, and I got stopped at security. Honestly though…I didn’t even think to take a couple of pulls before they escorted it away from me (after hearing about this guy though, now I know for next time…heheh). That was a sad moment. Luckily, my friend Denise remembered that story and got me a ‘replacement’ bottle for my birthday. *thanks again Denise

*thx for the article Samantha

A new mix was just posted up at Shockout.com yesterday and it is the first mix by Shockout’s latest addition to their DJ line-up, Selectah Sandman.  The mix is titled ‘Deejay Tribute’ and features a grip of cool roots joints for your ear sockets.  This mix is perfect for those of you that love the old-school.

 Feel free to hit up Sandman on his email or myspace to let him know what you think. (*click the image above to go to Shockout.com)

Enjoy…peace,
   zOnk.oNe 

I believe that in these difficult and mean-spirited times we live in, there needs to be a message of hope.  Just a single image that speaks to us of love, harmony, peace and joy.  An image that suggests the universal brotherhood of man. I have found that image, and I ask that all of you take a moment to be inspired by it. 

*thx for the email Mr Stone

Over the weekend, I went to a Christmas cocktail party and, of course, there were shots being poured. And as most people know, when alcohol is being consumed, the drinkers of said alcohol often ‘toast’ prior to the actual consumption. One of the attendees was happily explaining that he knew how to say ‘Cheers’ in six different languages and that he was trying to learn as many as possible. That’s when I decided to, once again, tell the story of ‘el pay’. The next day I realized how many times I had told that story, and how many of my friends now use the term ‘el pay’ (especially when I’m around, I’m sure) to ‘toast’. Obviously, now that I’ve got this blog, the only logical thing to do is to write out the story for the rest of the world to read. Here we go:

*This starts off with a sad aspect, but ultimately, the memory is a positive one in my mind.

The last time I got to hang out with my Grandpa was over a Winter break while I was attending Chico State. He had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and was in hospice at my parents’ house. My Grandpa was known to be a great joke teller, lots of fun, and knower of a wealth of stories, with which he had a knack for telling. The night before I was scheduled to head back up to Chico, we sat, just he and I, and shot the shit. It was very cool, and we covered a ton of subjects….from religion to U.F.O.’s. At one point, he asked me to get the bottle of Jagermeister out of the freezer and grab two shot glasses. I expressed my concern asking whether or not it was a good idea that he drink anything and he assured me there was a method to his madness. He told me to pour a shot for myself and a ‘taste’ for him. Once the shots were poured he told me that a long time ago, when he was living in Germany, he worked delivering beer (yes, people got cases of beer delivered to thier houses, like people used to get milk delivered). He said that among some of his friends that spoke Plattdeutsch, they had a ‘cheers’ that had since dissapeared from the common terms said at drinking festivities. He told me that they used to say “EL PAY” and that it meant ‘let it pour’, and with that we bumped glasses and drank. He said he wanted to pass the term along to me, as he saw me as the ‘light of the family’. He explained that he meant that as; he saw me as the social, joke-telling person that brought smiles to people’s faces at our family gatherings…and I happened to enjoy the occasional drink. Needless to say, I was and have been more than honored to have been passed this bit of imformation. Over the years, I have, in turn, passed the ‘el pay’ and the story to many of my close friends in honor of my Grandpa… and now to whoever should happen upon this blog. So next time you’re pouring a drink with friends, feel free to click glasses and say “el pay”.

*I talked to my Dad who since informed me that the reason this term sounds so ‘un-German’ is that it is actually an abreviation and “el pay” is for the letters ‘L’ and ‘P’. The full expresion is ‘Lotet Poltern’ which litterally means, ‘Let it pour’.

Peace,
zOnk.oNe