To The Woman That Crapped In My Car…

Category: Funny/Etc.

If you haven’t seen this yet…here’s your opportunity (obviously). This has been passed around the net as a ‘real’ Craigslist entry and, of course, there’s debate as to whether it’s legit or not. The below image might be kinda hard to read…so below it is the full, typed out version:
To the woman that crapped in my car
We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.

I thought we had chemistry sitting at McMenamins sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Terminator Stout. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.

At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don’t feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said “First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me” was meant to be funny, not offensive.

I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle’s lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don’t think anyone wins 100% of the time. That’s why they call it “gambling”. I’m the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better…like when you’re not sitting on a heated leather seat…

What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.

I await your call,
Tad

P.S. – If you shat yourself on purpose to end the evening early…Touché…

And to add to the mystery of its’ validity; there’s this response that was also posted after ‘Tad’ put up his Craigslist ad. I guess he says he received some emails…and he addresses them here:

I posted an item a week ago in hopes of finding a specific woman. I received a number of encouraging emails from people, but one person decided to respond to me rather rudely and flag it for “miscategorized.” It was posted under “men seeking women”. I am a man, seeking a woman. I really thought that was clear in the post.

It is sad to see that someone feels the need to wrongly flag my post and then email me with mean phrases that looked as if they were strung together by a ten year old.

So, to the person that wasn’t courage enough to send me an email with their real name:

1) Go back to school. Get your G.E.D. and enjoy your life washing dishes at Denny’s.

2) If you are going to send an email attacking someone, have the courage to leave your name. My name is Tad.

3) She contacted me today so go fuck yourself!

To those that read this and is not the mean person: I apologize for saying “fuck” but I really do think the cowardly person should stop being mean to others OR I hope he/she is mean to the wrong person (wink wink).

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